A few things on my mind...

I have had a lot on my mind lately and I feel that my blog is the only place I can really get it all out without getting in trouble!

First off...I don't like being a grown up! I hate having to worry about money and finances and bills and the future and working and what are we going to do when this happens or when that happens... There is just so much uncertainty it gets scary. I remember when my biggest worry in the world was what Barbie am I going to play with today or what friend should I invite over to play with. Man I wish it was that easy! I love being married and I love my husband more than I ever have, but why can't things just be easy?! I know there's a purpose for everything and I know I chose that and I wouldn't change it for anything but sometimes I just wish that things didn't cause so much stress!!!!

Second... this may be too much information, but I figure not many read this anyways so what the heck haha! So being a newlywed I of course like most newlyweds went on birth control. I went to the doctor, and being diabetic, I asked him what form of birth control would have the LEAST effect on my diabetes, and stupid me thinking the doctor actually knew what he was talking about, was told that the Mirena IUD would be the best. Now for those of you who don't know what that one is, it's the one with added hormones... BIG MISTAKE! 956 dollars later (because my stupid insurance doesn't cover birth control) I am stuck with this IUD and not knowing what to do. I hate what it's doing to my diabetes. Its making my numbers go crazy! I can take the same amount of insulin everyday and eat the exact same things everyday and somedays they honestly are just all over the place! Not to mention I feel like I belong in a mental institution most of the time because of my mood swings. I can be the happiest person in the world and then all of a sudden, something flips inside me and I want to absolutely kill someone and then I just want to cry hysterically the next minute! Now I know I was a little crazy before I got the IUD but I feel that it's made me even more crazy now! Other effects are acne (I have never had bad skin and now I get zits like crazy!) I am tired all the time and I get really defensive really quickly. I also feel like I have anxiety even more than I did before! So what do I do??? My doctor gave me a different anti-depressant with some anxiety medicine in it to see if that helps with my mood swings because she felt bad that I paid so much for my stupid IUD and haven't even had it for a year, so she didn't want to tell me to get it out just yet, but geez why the crap can't my insurance cover birth control or why didn't my woman doctor give me the IUD without hormones?! I'm angry at this situation, but oh well I just have to wait it out I guess... Sorry I'm done with that round of venting!

OK this will be my last item to complain about, but why is it ok for grown people to act like they're in high school?! Seriously, I hated high school and I have been out of high school for a while now, yet just recently I feel like I am back in it and it's very annoying! I try to do the right thing by doing my job (like I thought I was supposed to) and other people find it ok just to sit around and b.s. instead of doing their job, so I say something and they find it ok also to call me a name that they think is also ok because the term here where I work is supposedly a term of endearment... but then I'm the bad guy for taking offense to being called a name I should've never been called in the first place and now the other person has everyone on their side and only hearing his side of the arguement leaving me all by my little lonesome! Oh well I guess right?! I was trying to do my job and yet I'm the one that is left by myself... and yet the other person is trying to turn everyone against me! How old are you?! OK I promise I'm done venting. This post isn't very pleasant, but even if nobody reads this, I do feel a bit better after getting it all out somewhere!

To leave on a happy note, Jeff and I booked our next vacation to... are you ready for it???   MEXICO!! Yes we're going to Mexico again, we're going to stay at a resort in Cabo for a week! We leave July 25 and come back on July 30 and I cannot wait! Did I mention I love my husband?!

That's all for now!